11 In Fashion

Confidence at Midlife

 

Hi Ladies!
We are in PA for a visit with my in-laws, so I wrote this post before I left as I have been thinking about what has changed the older I get. There are alot of things, as you know, both emotionally and physically, but for today I am taking about Confidence at Midlife. I hope to be able to comment and get around to visiting, but know I’ll do my best!

. I do find the word Midlife kind of funny at this point, as how long do you consider yourself middle-aged? I am 49 in a couple months, so I suppose that I am being optimistic 🙂
Do you wake up each morning unsatisfied with what you see in the mirror Or are you like Stuart Smalley of Saturday Night Live fame? I am good enough… smart enough….with his Daily Affirmations?

Perhaps there is a middle ground. I know as we all grow up we hear about wisdom as we age. Is this something we take granted? I feel at this point in life, I know what being wise means. I do beleive it is about taking a more comprehensive look at yourself and thinking about all of the things you have to offer in life. what you have learned, what lessons have you been taught?
When I was younger in 7th and 8th grade, as well as the last several years of high school, I was bullied. My mom still thinks I think about it. No, I don’t dwell on it, but it does make me think about my personality back then. Why didn’t I stick up for myself? As time goes on, I realized it was probably because I was not assertive or perhaps not as confident in myself as I am now.

At this point in life, I feel I know myself pretty well. What makes you feel confident?
1. You may know yourself better and are comfortable in your own skin.
2. You have accepted that you are going to get grey hairs and realize it isn’t the end of the world!
3. Try to be positive. I know, with a chronic illness, there are days that is tough. Negativity does just bring you down,.
4. You care less about what other people think.
5. You dress nicely for yourself and how it makes you feel. I have always thought dressing nicely made me feel better, as I am trying to put my best foot forward. I do it because it makes me feel good.
6. You realize that in the “Overall scheme of life” that many things just aren’t that important! You realize that family, friends, loved ones are the most important thing in life and you  dont “let the small stuff” get you down.

  1. Being strong or assertive doesn’t mean pushy or aggressive.

  2. Confidence comes with being happy with the person that you are. Flaws, imperfections and all. The good and the bad. There is always room for self-improvement, but there is also acceptance. It is a rather freeing feeling!

  3. Do you have strong beliefs? Are you confident in those beliefs as they are a cornerstone to your being?

  4. Love yourself for who you are, as comparison to others is not productive in any way!

So tell me, what does “Confidence” mean to you? At midlife or any other stage? 

Leave a comment below, Id love to hear from you!

Have a wonderful weekend!

Jess xo

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11 Comments

  • Reply
    Do Your Fears Hold You Back? - Over 40 Fashion Blog | Elegantly Dressed and Stylish - Over 40 Fashion Blog
    August 11, 2017 at 1:00 am

    […] do want to know, but I also want to know somethings on a deeper level..I have talked before about “Confidence at Midlife” and asked ” What Makes you Happy?‘ but today I thought I would discuss if your fears […]

  • Reply
    Amy Christensen
    May 27, 2017 at 10:39 am

    Jess, you are such a beautiful individual and your confidence is clearly evident. My husband was bullied when he was a boy and it definitely formed who he is. But he became confident because he did learn to stick up for himself and (unfortunately) he had to learn to fight back. Kids can be so very nasty….but then so can adults. I struggle with confidence, but I feel most confident when I remember that I am a creation of an almighty God who loves and cares about me at every bend and turn. Thanks so much for sharing and I hope you have a wonderful weekend away. Happy Memorial Day! – Amy
    http://stylingrannymama.com/

    • Reply
      Jess Jannenga
      May 28, 2017 at 1:40 pm

      Aw, thank you Amy! That means a lot! Yes, I am very much over the fact that there was bullying in high school, however, I look back and think why didn’t I assert myself? You have a wonderful way of looking at things. I appreciate your comments as always Amy. Happy Memorial Day to you too! xx

  • Reply
    Mara Murgo
    May 26, 2017 at 11:01 pm

    I like myself better now that I am older. I am much wiser and understand the important things in life. I am so sorry you were bullied. I wish we went to high school together. I always looked up to you and thought you were a wonderful person. Bullies always have a low self esteem and try to build themselves up by hurting others. I realize that now as a teacher.

    • Reply
      Jess Jannenga
      May 28, 2017 at 1:51 pm

      HI Mara, So good to hear from you!! I understand what you mean about things in life. I wish we had gone to the same high school too! I think about you and how you are often! xx

  • Reply
    Jess Jannenga
    May 26, 2017 at 12:20 pm

    Thank you Nancy! you too! xx

  • Reply
    Sarah Blodgett
    May 26, 2017 at 10:15 am

    Definitely needed this post today… I’m getting very close to midlife and I’m realizing that even though it scars me, I’m smarter, more confident, more motivated then I ever have been. Thanks for the reminder of that!
    Kisses,
    Sarah
    EverydayStarlet

    • Reply
      Jess Jannenga
      May 26, 2017 at 12:23 pm

      Thank you Sarah , yes I agree! It seems that experience and confidence in ones self at least for me, increased with age. It is quite a freeing feeling to let go of some of the hangups I had when I was younger. xx

  • Reply
    robjodiefilogomo
    May 26, 2017 at 9:29 am

    I’m so glad I’m this age now!! I would never want to go back to the younger days when I was unsure.
    I think having our experiences in life helps so much—and friends!!
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • Reply
      Jess Jannenga
      May 26, 2017 at 12:21 pm

      So true Jodie, yes I feel like I am more grounded and have more confidence than when I was younger. It helps to have friends that you can share experiences with as well. Glad you enjoyed the post. xx

  • Reply
    Nancy
    May 26, 2017 at 2:41 am

    Enjoy your weekend Jess!

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